A few days ago I turned sixty-six in linear or clock time. But in the few days since, I have been noticing that - instead of feeling crowded and heavy with all that I have gathered and learned in those sixty-six years - I am getting lighter and lighter.
I am shedding instead of piling on more...not only clothes and books and "stuff" - the perennial definitions of our culture, but thoughts and feelings and beliefs - even relationships - that used to define me. Light is pouring into those empty spaces,
and when someone asks how it feels to be this age, the first word that comes to me is "free" - I feel freer than I used to in the years leading up to this, when there was so much to learn to get, to be, to take care of, to conform to, and to complete. This
is a more spacious, open, less hurried time...and a surprise indeed. Lots more to explore, or even better, to allow an unfolding of...
The photo I chose for this reflection (and birthday) is actually the door latch on a washroom in an Edmonton Retreat
Centre where I was working recently. "Fiat" is a Latin word meaning "Let it be done" or "Let it be so." It is the word ascribed to Mary when she said yes to being the Mother of Jesus. "Fiat" is how I feel about life after sixty-six...an increasing
affirming of how it is all unfolding...my part is to let it be, surrender, consent...and see the good in all, even what I don't understand. This is, when I can actually allow it, a very peaceful place.